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Religion/ Festivals and Spirituality

Comparisons do not make sense!

Really, life teaches so many new things that we should know and our perception totally changes as we progress in our age! Few years ago, I did not possess the mind-set and happiness I have now. Every life and every person is different and it makes no sense to compare ourselves with any other person. But, even to get to this view-point or stand-point .. it takes its own time to arrive.

When I was 12 years old .. I stated to my paternal uncle..”Do not compare the incomparable!” I said this just out of impulse and did not know the deep ‘hidden’ truth about successful or happy living. But, my uncle was very impressed and praised me a lot for the statement made by me. As we get older, this statement makes more sense. Each individual has a different life to lead and he or she is product of several aspects .. the circumstances he was put into, his decisions, his personality, his capability, his choices etc. The list could go on, if we elaborate further.

Is it Destiny and free will? … is an age-old topic for a debate! So, I will not go into that. Everyone puts his best from what is available with him or her. I see plenty of different lives rolled into their resumes .. as I interview many candidates. As a part of my profession ( sales & marketing), I have interacted with innumerable personalities coming from both gender. And I have become more receptive and analytical now. I can dissect quickly and work like a surgeon .. I have managed to be ‘right on the target’ and recruit the most suitable or the right candidates as opined by my MD. Way back in 1989, I used to appoint administrative staff for the franchised outlets of my company ….. they were much junior positions. But, now I am recruiting profit center heads and I have to report my selection to the MD of the company. Why should we compare? Rather we should be able fit the right pieces with us .. into the jigsaw puzzle and meet the requirements of our lives.

‘Success’ is itself too subjective to interpret. How do we really define success? Neither Shiv Khera ( famed author of ‘YOU CAN WIN’ by Shiv Khera) or other self-improvement books I have read could explain well this aspect through their ‘money spinner’ books! Books are too hypothetical or theoretical.

Is it job satisfaction or personal happiness or money earned or the relations we develop or married life or our children or one’s personal health? Can Success be quantified or measured by any one yardstick alone? Self-help books cannot really decipher this puzzle! The other day I met an old friend of mine and was quite saddened to know that he is doing better than me in his career. I was nearly devastated! How did he get such a job offer? Oh, he is making so much money .. much more than me. Ugh! I could not even take it! Exactly about ten days later .. he sent me a SMS announcing he has been blessed with a second daughter at his late age of 45+ years. And you will be surprised I was instantly happy without much self-effort and even puzzled trying to understand his difficulties of bringing up a small child at his age. ‘Oh! what a fool he is!’ was my first reaction. Two daughters to be educated and get them married! But, all these thoughts remain to be mere perception of one’s mind. Nobody should compare one’s life with that of anybody else.

Often, I motivate myself .. that despite all the problems and challenges I have faced .. I am quite successful due to tireless perseverance and absolute positive attitude of mine. And I am really happy to feel this way. And I am thankful to God for whatever he has given me. Really, No regrets at all! I do not grudge anyone or envy anyone or feel jealous of others etc. Don’t you think .. that is being really successful? Being thankful to God .. makes me very happy.

So, why should we compare? Every one has a different life to lead .. a unique one that cannot be compared .. Am I not right?


About Raman Ramamurthy

I am a Management consultant, an avid reader, play Lawn tennis in my leisure time and love Music. Presently, I am settled in India along with my wife and my son.


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